Glasgow words Edge Edgie Edgy Eejit Eff Blind Efter Electric Soup Emdy Polis Erra Erse

Glaswegian words beginning : E

Glaswegian	English	Example and Translation
Edge, Edgie	Keep a look out ( Keep the edge).
Edgy	Keeping a lookout.
Edinburger	A person who resides in the capital of Scotland - Edinburgh.	Glasgow v Edinburgh An Edinburger who’s handy with a blade is called a butcher – a Weggie who’s handy with a blade is called a thug. An Edinburger who like flowers is called a horticulturalist – a Weggie who likes flowers is called a poof. [From A Midge in Your Hand is Worth Two Up the Kilt] Edinburgh Castle - site of the terrible Edinburger - Glaswegian battle of 1902 during which two dogs were savagely bitten by a mad Edinburger. No human deaths were recorded.
Eejit	Idiot / simpleton / not too bright / daft / a numpty	Thon wee eejit Davie McIver hus goan and joined MENSA. I hate Davie McIver! Eejits - despite all the warning signs, daft schoolboys diving into the crocodile infested water of the River Clyde (In 1998 crocodiles escaped from Glasgow Zoo - there are now several hundred in the clyde. Six people were killed in 2008 by crocodiles.)
Eekies	Squared Up / All debt paid off.	Right, you gave ma a slug o' yer Irn-Bru and Ah gave you a dod o' ma tablet - so that's us eekies.
Eff and Blind	Swear
Efter	After	Ah'll see ye efter the game. I shall meet you in the pub nearby the football ground and we shall get pissed.
Efternin	Afternoon
Eh	Yes (commonly used in Dundee)
Electric Soup	Cheap strong wine. e.g El Dorado or Buckfast	Electric Soup - Cheep Wine - tastes awful but does the job . . .
Emdy	Anybody Emdy noun A contraction of the English term ‘anybody’. The word is invariably used in conjunction with the word ‘gorra’ to produce the phrase ‘Emdy gorra’. This is then suffixed with a variety of works such as ‘fag’, ‘joint’ or 'bloody clue where Ah live’. [From Ned Speak by Stuart McLean]	Emdy goat a clue where a bloody live? I am so intoxicated that momentarily I seem to have misplaced my memory.
Er the Polis	There's the police	Typical Glaswegian Policeman with red bobble on his helmet.
Err	There
Erra	Erra exclamation A mutilated version of the English expression, ‘Oh my gosh, there is the’. It is common to hear a Ned’s distressing cries of, “Erra Polis”, or when high on glue, “Erra purple elephant salsa dancing on ra ceiling”. [From Ned Speak by Stuart McLean]
Erse	Backside
Ersed	Mainly used in the expression 'Ah cannae be ersed'.	'Ah cannae be ersed getting a job'. One look at me and everyone realises that I'm a complete waster so I can't find employement.
Every fart's end	Every last detail
Eye ball	Meet someone face to face

From Why Did the Haggis Cross the Road?

by Stuart McLean

Loch Ness Monster Jokes

Nessie is lying at the bottom of the loch moaning to his wife.
“Ma bloody stomach is aching,” he grumbles.
“Och it serves you right, for eating them American tourists,” replies Mrs Ness, “You know they’re far too rich for you.”

What’s big and white and chills out at the bottom of Loch Ness?
The Loch Ness Refrigerator.

A lady goes into a bar with Nessie on a leash. The bartender looks over and says, ''Hey, you cannae bring that ugly fat pig in here.''
''Excuse me,” said the lady indignantly, “but if you’d put your glasses on you’d see that this is the Loch Ness Monster.''
''Ah wisnae takin’ tae you,” says the barman, “Ah wis takin’ tae the monster.''